Dear Tom and Ray:

I once knew a local minister who completely deflated all his tires twice annually, then reinflated them with fresh air. He claimed the procedure prevents bumpiness and makes the car ride smoother. I think he's crazy, but his claim was just persuasive enough to leave a slight shred of doubt in my mind. So I thought I'd end my sleepless nights spent pondering this scenario by asking the experts. Thanks! -- Cliff

RAY: Well, we hadn't known about this before, Cliff. But starting this afternoon, you can get the air changed in all four of your tires for the bargain price of $99.95.

TOM: I'm dying to know the argument he used to persuade you, Cliff. I mean, I can't even make up a plausible argument for doing this, and yet he managed to leave you sleepless over a period of years, thinking about it.

RAY: Knowing the argument wouldn't help us sell this service to our customers, though.

TOM: It wouldn't?

RAY: No. Remember, the guy was a minister. If a minister tells you the sky is green, you'd seriously consider the possibility.

TOM: Right. But if we try to tell a customer that the Earth is round, he stabs his finger in our chest and says, "I know you guys are hosing me!"

RAY: Exactly.

TOM: Well, here's the only plausible explanation, Cliff. Once upon a time, there was a black hole in the universe. And over many billions of years, an atmosphere formed in that black hole. Planets developed, too.

RAY: So if you drove the car with that same air in those tires for billions of years, you might eventually form planets in there, which would, indeed, lead to a bumpier ride.