Dear Tom and Ray:

We want you to break the news to us gently. Are we both gullible or what? My friend and I both dropped $50 on a gadget that is supposed to increase our gas mileage. It's a four inch magnet which straps onto the fuel line. The belief is that the gas is burned more efficiently because the gas is turned into a finer mist. The mechanics at my friend's garage were just about rolling on the floor with laughter when she explained it to them. Tell us, have we been had?
Mary and Sue

RAY: Well, I tried one of these things in my truck, too. And I'm sorry to report that my gas mileage hasn't improved at all. I did, however, notice that my carburetor has recently started to grow hair!

TOM: As far as we know, these things don't work, Mary and Sue. Like a lot of things, this sounds good in theory, but.... in reality, it doesn't do diddley.

RAY: I'm sure the manufacturers of these things will have our legal staff over at Dewey, Cheetham, and Howe, all tied up tomorrow morning. And if they send us any credible, INDEPENDENT evidence that these things really work, we'll pass it along to you. But in the mean time, I wouldn't tell any vacuum cleaner salesmen that you dropped $50 on one of these gadgets. They'll be all over you like white on rice.